Third Way: Polit-icks, A Conversation On Cross-Political Relationships

Debraj

Politics is everywhere, whether we see it or not. Everything we do is political. Every time we buy groceries, or go shopping, or walk down a street. The U.S. Department of Agriculture regulates trade on the strawberries in your shopping cart; your local government sets the sales tax you see listed on your shirt’s price tag; the road under your feet was funded by taxpayer dollars reserved for city renovations. Everything is political. Relationships are no different.

There are approximately 8.3 billion people alive on planet Earth at present. Of these people, all 8.3 billion are living unique lives, shaped by different dreams, goals, and individual ideals. One of the clearest modern-day manifestations of these varying aspects of the human experience is the way in which they align with differing political ideologies and where we all stand on the political spectrum. 

The colloquialism of “opposites attract” may very well be true when it comes to superficial aspects such as hobbies or favorite foods, but what if we go deeper? What happens when our ideals and belief systems don't align? Can attraction transcend this as well?

It seems interpersonal relationships take the hardest hit when it comes to political division in a societal setting, particularly in the last decade as the political stage has only grown in its volatility. Cynical as it may be, it is unfortunately also true. Long gone are the days of politicians from opposite sides of the aisle setting down their egos and bonding over the commonality of their shared humanity. 

There is an assumption that those whom we do not align with politically are, at best, ignorant, and at worst, just plain malicious. We formulate these notions and then are shocked when the world is incapable of civilized political discussions with the opposing side. This is particularly evident when observing the divisiveness between young men and women in today’s society.

Traditionally, women have always been more left-leaning than men. Data reported by the Pew Research Center in 2018 showed that since 2010, the rate of women who leaned toward the Democratic Party rose from 51% to 56%, whereas their male counterparts reported 44% leaning towards the Democratic Party in 2018. In the wake of the overturning of Roe v. Wade, men and women saw a division unlike many before. For women, it was the day that the proverbial rug was pulled out from under us in one of the most intense ways in decades; for men, it was a Friday. This bred a sense of resentment between genders, as women were angry and many of their male counterparts struggled to understand.

Since that fateful day in 2022, abortion rights and women's reproductive health have become one of the most divisive issues in politics. A Gallup Poll done in 2025 reported that 61% of women identified themselves as “pro-choice,” with only 41% of men saying the same. Women’s bodies have never been our own. In medieval times, we were viewed as little more than a womb, simply a vessel for carrying on a family name and legacy. In the 20th century, we were housewives and, by legislation, made to have little option but to rely on a man; and today still, the choices we make regarding our bodies are not our own. Women are angry, rightfully so, and some of that anger is directed at men. Specifically at the men who believe that they have any right to decide what happens to a woman’s body. In any human interaction, there must be mutual respect, especially in intimate relationships. As such, the question begs to be asked: In such a polarized world, how do you foster this respect?

It is said that one of the most effective ways for someone to change their viewpoint on something is to experience it firsthand. This is largely noticed when observing the shift in individual beliefs regarding LGBTQIA+ rights, such as support of same-sex marriage. To that point, could it be argued that cross-political relationships are actually the future of healthy political discourse?

Data For Progress surveyed 1,229 voters across the dates of September 29th to October 1st, 2023, wherein they looked at the correlation between knowing someone who identified as transgender and level of sympathy for the transgender community. Their results yielded a clear connection between the firsthand experience of knowing a transgender individual and an increased sense of empathy for the community. According to the study, voters who identified as knowing a transgender individual displayed a rate of sympathy that was nearly double their counterparts, at 68%. Conversely, those who did not identify as knowing a transgender individual reported a rate of sympathy at 35%.

If two individuals with differing viewpoints meet, talk, spend more and more time together, and consequently end up in a serious relationship, the mutual respect they have for each other may then cause them to be more open-minded when discussing politics with their partner. That sense of mutual respect is what is severely missing from today’s political discussions. This experience of willingness to learn from each other could be likened to that of two young children playing together. As kids, we do not hate or judge; we question. Our nature is that of curiosity and exploration. As we grow, we abandon this childlike perspective, and whether conscious or not, we become jaded to the world and to those we disagree with. We force each other into boxes, yet protest when the same is done to us. Humanity is a serpent eating its own tail, trapped in a cyclical hell of oppressing one another and refusing to take accountability.

In a world of growing polarization and political unrest, the foundation of our world must be our humanity. No matter how much we disagree, no matter your religious affiliation (or lack thereof), no matter how you identify or who you love, no matter the color of your skin, we are all human. We all breathe oxygen, bleed red, and will die one day. Our time on Earth is finite, and to spend it hating one another would be a devastating waste. So, go out and meet people, experience new things, make friends, fall in love, and in doing so, ponder the truth that our mortality is what unites us and maybe, just maybe, spending time with those we disagree with doesn't need to be a bad thing.